Illustration by Annie Leue
I have a serious passion for creepy dolls and terrible horror movies. “Annabelle: Creation” was basically made for me. The only thing I love more than creepy dolls and bad horror movies is forcing a friend, who does not appreciate these two things, to come watch a movie with me. Emily Rich, the most Brave Little Toaster of all my friends, graciously agreed to accompany me (after I bought her ticket, candy, and drink). Neither one of us was prepared for the shocker of the century when “Annabelle: Creation” was not only subpar, but also super gay. Director David Sandberg, somehow managed to combine my three favorite things in ways I could have never expected. Move over “Babadook”, “Annabelle” is my new queer icon.
The queer reading of “Annabelle” could really go any direction. If I were Catholic, I would probably see the connection between the devil and the little queer girl in a much more homophobic way. Emily’s lapsed Catholicism was triggered. But, I’m not Catholic, so I choose to believe this pure little lesbian just happened to be possessed by the devil.
On a serious note, there’s an interesting, really just problematic, streak of ableism. It may actually be the most fascinating example of ableism I’ve ever seen in a film. In some ways, the film sets up Jan suffering from polio with a plan to address this morally or ethically, what have you. Jan is worried early on that Satan is going after her because she’s “the weakest,” and this point is addressed eloquently when Sister Charlotte explains to Jan why her body doesn’t make her the weakest. At first I was like, well bravo writers. But somehow this moment is completely annihilated by the rest of the film, where a queer-coded, physically disabled little girl is targeted by the devil for no other clearly outlined reasons.
Move over “Babadook”, “Annabelle” is my new queer icon.
Back to the gay thing: Right at the beginning Emily and I were both seriously queer-baited. Jan (Talitha Bateman) and Linda (Lulu Wilson) have so much chemistry, it almost made me uncomfortable. Jan and Linda are both orphans being shuttled around 1940s America with an all girls Catholic orphanage. It’s an amazing setup for both a horror movie and really sketchy lesbian drama.
The best scene, by far, shows Jan and Linda sitting on Jan’s bed praying to someday get adopted together, so they can be “real sisters.” I wasn’t aware that’s what they called us in the ‘40s, but that is what I plan on calling any of my future “real sisters.” Emily and I both silently pray for the day Beth Nugent adopts both of us so we can be real sisters.
Honestly, Linda is the true hero of the film, as Lindas always are. Her only mistake is accidentally shooting Annabelle (the doll pre-demon) in the face with the ‘40s equivalent of a nerf gun. This was Emily’s favorite part, and it was astonishing that only Emily and some guy in the back of the theater laughed. The antique nerf gun reappears as Linda’s weapon of choice once she knows the devil is after her poor little lesbian soul. Emily makes a fair point that Linda’s method of shooting blindly into the dark hallway at Satan maybe wasn’t a great strategy. It also makes it really predictable when Satan/Annabelle just grabs the nerf ball leaving Linda to reel in the devil like a fish. Still, Linda is bae.
Linda’s best line, according to Emily, is right at the end of a scene when she runs to throw the Annabelle doll down the well. She’s almost pulled down the well, but (real) Sister Charlotte rescues her in the knick of time. Sister Charlotte shuts the well, then backs up watching Annabelle smash the lid up and down trying to break out. Like any other woman dressed in a white nightgown from any other horror movie, Charlotte asks, “what was that” rather than running away. Linda screams “who CARES! RUN!” along with every person in the theater.
I personally prefer Annabelle/Jan’s line as she’s stabbing Linda’s porcelain doll, Sweet Sue, repeatedly in the face. “You know what I love most about Sweet Sue? [looks up at Linda with devil eyes] She looks just like you.” This is the porcelain doll I’m buying Emily that looks just like me. All she needs is a tiny, doll-sized flannel and combat boots. Her name is Terrific Taylor.
All in all, Annabelle gets 2.5 stars. It is, in fact, a film that exists. It manages to not be a horrible enough movie to hate-watch, but also it doesn’t really add much to the world. The queer-coding and ableism are the only things that make the movie interesting, but that doesn’t seem intentional on the director’s part. If anything, the movie just inspired me to start collecting porcelain dolls. One for everyone I know.
I’m sorry, but I can’t encourage you to sort of Post. I am part of the Lbgtqi+ population 51 years old watch this movie several times and given the fact that I’m guessing that you are younger than me by the way you write this of course I can’t say that I have scientific as it is to prove that your use of grammar gives any real estimate on your age. But let’s just say I’m correct and you are younger. I have noticed a trend lately and that is that younger people are trying really hard to find queer or trans or gender related scenes where they don’t actually exist there was nothing unusual about too young girls in the 1940s being best friends and being more comfortable with physical contact. I mean even in the 1980s girls had actual pillow fights nearly every movie it was there for no other reason then to try to arouse straight males to get them towards the movie. And thanks to the digital age big brother whoever they are have been able to monitor through our technology the most paused movie scenes of all time and roughly 90% of them involve lesbians or attractive women with very little clothing on or naked women or partly naked women or women kissing You I’m going with this right? sometimes a duck is just a duck but I think if you were to talk to the director face-to-face always willing to place money on the fact that he was just trying to form a very close bond between the two girls and it had nothing to do with sexuality or anything lesbian related at their age not only would it be inappropriate in a movie that was premiered around the world but the fact that they are underage would also make it top pornography in a way and I don’t see any directed doing that unless you wanted to quickly ruin his career. I think you’re seeing what you want to see in you ‘real sisters’ theory. I’m sorry but I think you’re a tad obsessed or you’re just bombing the Internet with gender related trolls to get attention known to be wrong once twice I did 51 years that’s almost 100% perfectly right. I don’t mean to be cruel to you. I’m just trying to make you realise that two people of the same sex can be very close friends and even have plutonic love for each other without being gay and I see no mention of you noting that the fact and just assuming that they are lesbians from the start of the movie it’s almost like they’re not obsessed with each other. You’re obsessed with the idea of them being obsessed with each other, maybe I’m totally wrong but, that’s what it seems like you’re trying to portray in this Post. Enjoy your bad horror movies.