Illustration by Annie Leue
It’s crit week, y’all. It’s twice as important to remind yourself that no one else’s opinions mean anything, and really that nothing means anything. Here are some motivational jams to listen to while you slip into an existential crisis wondering “why do I make art,” and even more importantly, “why do I let people talk about my art?”
Scandal, Patty Smyth – “The Warrior”
First of all, you have to watch the music video because it is amazing. Patty Smyth fighting zombie men in a dark alley. The song alone is enough to get you pumped for a critique. “Shooting at the walls of heartache / BANG BANG.” I’m not sure what context someone should listen to this song other than preparing for people to criticize their art. #HeartToHeartYouWinIfYouSurvive
Pat Benatar – “Invincible”
It’s the same vibe as the first song, but I particularly love the line, “This shattered dream you cannot justify / We’re gonna scream until we’re satisfied.” This song is everyone during crit week, and throughout the rest of the year, to be honest. This is the perfect song for convincing yourself that you and your art are invincible.
“Ducktales” Theme Song
If there’s ever a time for a break from ‘80s lady rock, I guess it’s now. This is objectively the best children’s show theme song of all time.
Bonnie Tyler – “Total Eclipse of the Heart”
Back to ’80s pop-rock. This is another one where you need to watch the music video. This song is the perfect mood-setter since you’ve probably lost your hype from the first two songs. You can cry a little and worry about how “every now and then [you] fall apart.”
Kansas – “Carry On My Wayward Son”
Pull yourself together, Patricia.
Haddaway – “What is Love”
“Baby don’t hurt me/don’t hurt me no more!” Scream into the void as your final hopes die. Sure, making art was fun once, but those days are long gone.
Evanescence – “My Immortal”
Cry break.
Cyndi Lauper – “Girls Just Want To Have Fun”
Stop Crying!!! Even if your work is terrible, didn’t you just wanna have fun? Wasn’t that the point? Maybe?
The “Glee” cover of “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”
Cry again! This cover is terrible, and it still manages to make you sad even though you know it’s terrible. Now, you realize that everything you were telling yourself during Cyndi Lauper was a lie, and you really do care. Screw having fun, just embrace the pain.
Kansas “Dust In the Wind”
Remind yourself that nothing matters; whatever you’re creating is just dust in the wind. This also means that whatever anyone says about your art is completely useless. So, who’s the real idiot?
